Lighthouses and Life

I was just stopping in to write, because apparently I'm not so great at keeping up on a blog.. probably should've known that already, because I never was able to keep up on a diary/journal either. oh welll.

I was staring at my page, and thinking how different it looked since I changed it from some green thing to one with a lighthouse on it. It reminded me how very much I miss summer. Where I live now, I can go to the beach anytime I want to watch the sunsets, walk the pier to the lighthouse, swim,..or just walk around. Its actually incredibly peaceful. I like going when not many people are out and walking along the pier... but thats just me. As far back as I can remember, I've always had this love for lighthouses. We used to come here for vacation and I'd miss it when we were away, maybe thats why. But as a child, I always had a great feeling when I was able to look up from what I was doing and see a lighthouse at the end of a pier..it made me feel like I was in one of those movies where the kids are growing up this perfect little beach town or whatnot. I know no towns are perfect, but yeah.

Lighthouses are generally used for ships, so they know when they are getting close to shore and can avoid being stranded, right? So, what are our present day lighthouses? Friends, family, God, organizations,..etc. Our lighthouses are things that keep us on track and where we need to be, instead of being shipwrecked or stranded somewhere without any help. We always have people around us who would love to help us.. we just have to look to them purposely sometimes..  sometimes we need to admit we need help, and just as people look for the light on the lighthouse, we have to seek them out to help us. Lighthouses are there to help us. Why not take advantage of our resources? Theres no shame in needing help.. we all need it at times. Think about it.

When All Else Fails

I was just about to go to bed, but I had to write this.. just had to

I was laying in bed getting ready to end my day. I was warm and cozy in my blankets, cat sleeping next to me, and just peachy. I started to pray, and these were the words that came; "Dear God, I know we haven't spoke in a while.." and  I stopped. I then continued the sentence in my own thoughts "...but I keep coming back, because You have been faithful time and time again.." Those two thoughts seem a bit ironic to go together... but the point is; when I'm at a loss, I go to God, because thats the only thing I know for sure I can do. And I also know that He will be faithful. I love being able to know that.. and to have that relationship with the God of the universe. 

On a different note, the part of "..we haven't spoke in a while.." followed by "..You have been faithful.." strikes me as both comforting and not. Its awesome to know God will be faithful, .....even when I'm not, but sad to know that I am sometimes not faithful to Him. Its like the story of the prodigal son; he goes off and does his own thing; lives wildly, wastes his money, gets himself into stuff he shouldn't, but when he comes home, his father is overjoyed. Thats how it is with God and us. We go do our own thing and when all else fails, we turn to God, and He takes us back. As faithfully as anyone ever has. I'm so very thankful for that.. 

Hypocrites: Them? Us? or Both?

I haven't forgotten about writing, I've just been busy and have lacked a topic to write about. I promise =]

It was supposed to be a normal Sunday morning. I was going to get up, get ready, go to Sunday School and then the am service, but what did I do? ...turn my alarm off instead of hitting the snooze button. Brilliant. So I jump out of bed with about ten minutes to get ready and start my day. I made it to church just as they were ending the first song so I took a seat in a pew toward the back instead of sitting up where I normally do. The pastor got to the pulpit and talked for a bit and then the people who lead the worship came back up to lead a few more songs. I knew the ones who were my age and had no clue who the others were. I did especially notice one of them though, and I instantly stopped.

-I'm not judging this person, I'm just writing what I saw. I need to make some sense of this-

I had seen this person around and even talked to them, and wouldn't have guessed them to be up on stage helping to lead worship. They are really nice to just sit and  talk to, but I was dumbfounded. In conversing with people around our age I had heard this person use a wide variety of language, some of which I know for a fact they wouldn't even think about using in church.

So, being set back a bit, I thought about my own actions in public, and just in general. I thought about how I act at college and if those who talked to me would notice I'm not exactly your ordinary girl. People will notice things about you just from the language you use, your actions, everything. Granted, many of us let a few words slip every now and then, I'm not saying I don't. No one is perfect, but you don't have to be perfect to be different. I knew of a family at this church I used to go to. Super nice people, always upbeat and just fun to be around, at church. But at home level, they used language that wasn't good, did some things that weren't good, and so on. Sure, they were different, but not different enough to notice. ...How different are you?

All of this makes me think about this statement I hear once in a while: "the greatest cause for atheism is Christianity". And do you know why? Because people who claim to be Christians aren't living like Christians. You can go around saying "I'm a Christian, I love Jesus", but if your actions don't say the same thing, what does that say about you? People aren't going to wonder about the hope, love, and joy we have as Christians if they can't see its evidence in our lives. If they see they are no different than us, they think they have no reason to be a Christian and have a relationship with Jesus Christ. I don't know about you, but I want them to have that relationship.

On a different note, if I say those things, who is being the hypocrite, me or them? I know I'm not perfect, but my language and actions are definitely different. When I was younger one of my favorite movies was Harriet The Spy. After the kids read her notebook, her best friends are angry and won't talk to her. She goes to one of their houses and her friends dad talks to her. He gets her away from his dad, pushes her to the door, and tells her; "you can't be my friend if you're not my friend." It makes me think of the statement "you can't be different if you're not different", if you say you're different your life will reflect it. Its mainly a 'heart issue'. Whats in your heart flows to your mind, which in turn flows out of your mouth, hands, and whole being. You can only lie about who you are for so long and to a certain extent. People won't see you as different if you're not. Its quite simple actually...  

So, what does your life say about you? Do you feel a bit like a hypocrite sometimes, or do you think others are acting like one? Aside from the matter of what our heart is like, heres the question::

What do my words and actions say?